Fruit Violations

Last week we had our elimination lab, which means we got to learn how to put in Foley and In & Out catheters. You really have to watch keeping a sterile field during these procedures and to remember that once you put your non-dominate hand in the field (nice way of saying - grab the penis) that it is contaminated and you can't use it until you are done with the insertion. This is a skill that I need to practice, so I had the husband buy a grapefruit for me yesterday. I figured I could carve it up to approximate the labia and urethra. I will never be a pornographic fruit carver.


Oh and the orange next to it... It had been shot up the previous week in class when I learned how to give injections. No fruit is safe in my house.

Penises For Everyone!

This should have been the name of my last lab. I was such an adult and didn't laugh when I walked into our lab room last week. There, on the table for each of us, was a plastic penis. No, this wasn't a porno, we had to learn how to put on condom catheters.

A Great Name for a Dog Continued

Atelectasis - failure of the lung to expand completely. Now keep in mind that I go to school in a state known for a southern drawl and some of my instructors put this drawl onto some words. So imagine if you will standing outside yelling, "Come 'ere ă-de-LEXUS".

Yeah, Yeah It has been a while

Fall break got in the way and then I just never got back into the swing of writing. But, it has allowed me to stock up on some stories.

Student Nurse All Thumbs

I think that needs to be my nickname. The past two days have been very challenging to my ego. I have quickly discovered that I am a whiz at theory and a klutz at practice skills. Clincials this week dealt with bathing our clients. Let's just say I think there was more water on me by the end than used on the client. Let's just not go into the first time experience of putting on an adult incontinence product... thank goodness we had a client with a great amount of patience.

During lab we learned how to give intermittent tube feeds through a nasogastic tube. It was a great learning experience for all my classmates... they saw all of the things you shouldn't do while giving a tube feeding. I will be practicing that skill next week on my own so that I don't a) pull the NG tube right out of a clients nose and B) cause them to blow up like a balloon from all the air I allow into their system.

Well, off to take a dosage calculation retest. You have to get 100% on it and I did fine with the math (you know - the HARD part)... I just couldn't remember how many milliters in an ounce. Luckily I only have to take a portion of the test again.

Plus this afternoon I have my assessment skills check-off. I feel pretty good about it, so hopefully my partner won't be catapulted out of bed when I start adjusting it for the exam.