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McDonald's All-American

This summer I joined a gym in order to help lose weight and avoid being one of the people that I have seen in the hospital this summer.

I knew that I had sit through a sales pitch at the gym, but what I didn't expect was the sales guy wanting me to listen to his "story."

So picture it, I'm sitting in this cramped office in this gym while this fairly in shape guy leans in closer to tell me his story of woe.

He starts off by saying that he's had a tough journey on the roaid to fitness and he started it by saying he was a McDonald's All American.

Keep in mind - I think he is about to tell me something like "I was 400 lbs and was about to die because I was being smothered by my own weight."

So when he said McDonald's All American - I thought he meant that he ate a lot of McDonald's. So I naturally started laughing.

He was offended and asked me what I was laughing at - so I told him that I thought he ate a lot of McDonald's. After he wiped the "I've got a crazy white girl in my office" look from his face, he laughed and explained to me what the hell a McDonald's All American meant.

He made the sale, but I avoid him like a Big Mac when I am in there.

Standing up for the "Little Guy"

Oh CNN how I love you this morning. You brought me a newstory that warms my heart and renews my faith in my own ability to sniff out bullshit.

I have never trusted John Edwards. From the moment he bought the Senate primary election in NC I knew that he was the epitome of a politician, someone only looking out for his own interests. He is the man that repeatedly told the voters of NC that he wasn't interested in running for President, he wanted to serve his constituents, and then he turned around and ran for president. He's the man that told his presidential supporters that he wouldn't accept a place on the ticket with John Kerry, and then he took it. He is the man that told the laid off workers of Pillowtex in Kannapolis that he would help them in anyway he could, but failed to mention that his vote in Congress to establish free trade relations with China may have been a rung in the ladder that led to their situation.

Now he has admitted to an affair back in 2006.

The article mentions that he "had campaigned on the message that he was standing up for the little guy" I think we now know which little guy was standing up.

That's one bony elbow

CNN is carrying a story about a flight attendant who was assaulted by a passenger over liquid on an armrest. The flight attendant is suing the assaulter, who happens to be the wife of a preacher of one of these mega-churches.

The flight attendant says "she suffers from anxiety and hemorrhoids because of the incident"... she got elbowed by a mega-church soccer mom, where the hell did she hit her that hemorrhoids were a complication?

Eat some damn fiber and ya'll grow the hell up.

Riddle Me This

There is a news story on CNN that has the headline, "Friends, family mourn 'good kid' who died after Taser incident". My question is, if he was such a good kid, why did he put himself into a situation where the police would Taser him? Discuss it amongst yourselves. That is all.

Laughed Until It Hurt

Last night the husband and I went out on a date (gasp!). Yes - we were out past 7 pm and it didn't involve a drive through window.

We went to see Emo Philips last night. If you don't know who he is, check out the website. He's on the order of Steven Wright... and if you don't know who he is, then I can't help you. The husband mentioned that if Bobcat Goldthwait and Steven Wright had a child - it would be Emo Philips.

Anywho - we went to dinner at the comedy club and then to the show. We were seated next to the stage so we knew we could possibly be part of the show, and we weren't disappointed.

Several times Emo said something about being weird and maybe it was just coincidence, but he looked straight at the husband. Later Emo asked him what he did, to which he replied "Software Engineer" and so Emo followed up by asking, "So are you a musician?" The husband said, "No (but the bastard pointed to me and said I was)", to which Emo replied, "I've heard that genius and music go together, but obviously not in your case."

Later Emo asked me what instrument I played and I had to reply that I sang (which I did about 15 years ago). So he asked me what my favorite note was.

Then Emo asked how many children we had, I said none. He told the husband, "Flip her over next time."

It was a great night and Emo is someone we have wanted to see for a long time. I will leave you with a couple of things he said last night that stuck with me.

"I always wanted to teach spastic children, but then I realize they learn it on their own."

"I like a smart audience. If they don't have a good time they think it is their fault for not researching all their entertainment options. A stupid audience just blames the comic."

And my all time favorite...

"My ex-wife who shall remain nameless.... if I am ever alone with her tombstone and a sand blaster."

Nursing Informatics: A Topic Close To This Geek's Heart

I did a quick gander this morning to my syllabus to see what is in store for today's learning excitement. Our schedule is set up that Monday-Fridays we have Fundamentals of Nursing and on Fridays we have what I like to call "The Things the State Says We have to Teach You, but We Know You Don't Really Give a Rat's Ass About." This has no reflection on the instructor who is highly opinionated and very funny at the same time. She does a great job with really dry material.

So as I was saying, I saw that today one of the topics is Nursing Informatics. I had NO CLUE what this is so I looked it up and found that " “Nursing Informatics is a specialty that integrates nursing science, computer science, and information science to manage and communicate data, information, and knowledge in nursing practice." (ANA Scope and Standards of Nursing Informatics Practice, 2001,pg vii)

Here I was set to completely make fun of something and I ended up educating myself... not to mention the fact that we get to talk about data collection, computers and nursing - my trifecta!

I need a map to find her answer

I don't know what is worse

The fact that I had the time to find this clip or that I felt the need to share it.

Sturgeons General

Yes, I know it should be Surgeons General, but based on some news reports it sounds like the people who have held this position fought an upstream battle.

Former G. W. Bush appointed Surgeon General Dr. Richard Carmona is accusing the Bush administration for interfering on issues like stem cell research and emergency contraception because it didn't fit their political agenda. Excuse me while I try to appear shocked by this news.

Nope... can't do it.

I found it interesting that he and two other past Surgeons General testified to political interference while holding the post. Dr. C. Everett Koop said that the Reagan administration discouraged him from talking about AIDS and Dr. David Satcher said the Clinton administration asked him to delay releasing a report favorable to needle exchange programs. In both cases the men released the information.

Will anything change? No way, it's Washington. Was it nice to hear someone admit that there was political interference concerning public health all in the name of defending a particular groups dogma? Yes.