A Pain in the Pancreas

I didn't fall into a bedpan and get lost... Husband decided last week that his abdominal pain was bad enough to warrant a trip to the ER at {Big Name University}. Turns out that he had pancreatitis, so he earned a 5 day stay a Chateau {Big Name University}. Naturally this put a dent into my free time to blog, but everything is OK now.

For all you medical types you can appreciate this... his lipase on admission was off the scale at 4,000... man he's such an overachiever.

It Depends

I have some very funny and creative classmates. For the Rat's Ass class we have to read journal articles and present them, which we do in groups. One group today did a little skit about the various causes of bed wetting. Two people played the parents and the remaining four were children representing the various reasons. The four came into the room wrapped in a blanket and then the parents woke them up and the blanket was removed... they were all wearing adult diapers. Now that I type it, it doesn't seem as funny - but let me tell you - I will remember the article.

Laughed Until It Hurt

Last night the husband and I went out on a date (gasp!). Yes - we were out past 7 pm and it didn't involve a drive through window.

We went to see Emo Philips last night. If you don't know who he is, check out the website. He's on the order of Steven Wright... and if you don't know who he is, then I can't help you. The husband mentioned that if Bobcat Goldthwait and Steven Wright had a child - it would be Emo Philips.

Anywho - we went to dinner at the comedy club and then to the show. We were seated next to the stage so we knew we could possibly be part of the show, and we weren't disappointed.

Several times Emo said something about being weird and maybe it was just coincidence, but he looked straight at the husband. Later Emo asked him what he did, to which he replied "Software Engineer" and so Emo followed up by asking, "So are you a musician?" The husband said, "No (but the bastard pointed to me and said I was)", to which Emo replied, "I've heard that genius and music go together, but obviously not in your case."

Later Emo asked me what instrument I played and I had to reply that I sang (which I did about 15 years ago). So he asked me what my favorite note was.

Then Emo asked how many children we had, I said none. He told the husband, "Flip her over next time."

It was a great night and Emo is someone we have wanted to see for a long time. I will leave you with a couple of things he said last night that stuck with me.

"I always wanted to teach spastic children, but then I realize they learn it on their own."

"I like a smart audience. If they don't have a good time they think it is their fault for not researching all their entertainment options. A stupid audience just blames the comic."

And my all time favorite...

"My ex-wife who shall remain nameless.... if I am ever alone with her tombstone and a sand blaster."

A Leg to Stand On

During class the instructor was going over what would constitute nursing negligence. She gave an example of a double amputee falling out of bed and then suing for negligence. Naturally someone had to ask if the client would really have a leg to stand on.

Nursing Informatics: A Topic Close To This Geek's Heart

I did a quick gander this morning to my syllabus to see what is in store for today's learning excitement. Our schedule is set up that Monday-Fridays we have Fundamentals of Nursing and on Fridays we have what I like to call "The Things the State Says We have to Teach You, but We Know You Don't Really Give a Rat's Ass About." This has no reflection on the instructor who is highly opinionated and very funny at the same time. She does a great job with really dry material.

So as I was saying, I saw that today one of the topics is Nursing Informatics. I had NO CLUE what this is so I looked it up and found that " “Nursing Informatics is a specialty that integrates nursing science, computer science, and information science to manage and communicate data, information, and knowledge in nursing practice." (ANA Scope and Standards of Nursing Informatics Practice, 2001,pg vii)

Here I was set to completely make fun of something and I ended up educating myself... not to mention the fact that we get to talk about data collection, computers and nursing - my trifecta!

Dr. Nurse

Last Friday, Dr. Whirlwind (the head of our program) came into class to go over the many educational choices we will have after we graduate from the current program. You see, I am attending a school where I will get a diploma from the school and an Associates in Health Something or other from the school where we did the pre-req's.

She covered the RN-BSN route - which she said was good if you don't have another degree. She recommended that if you already have a degree, such as myself, then going into an RN-MSN program is the better choice. I was already leaning in that direction until she mentioned that there are more RN-PhD and RN-DNS (Doctor of Nursing Science) programs starting up. Naturally that got my attention since I eventually want to teach at a nursing school.

Time will tell which route I will go, but the Husband said, "Hmmm... Dr. Nurse - I like the sound of it."

Meltdown Avoided

Since we had Monday off it has been a short week for us (like almost everyone else in the country). I anticipate that my normal Friday 11 am meltdown won't happen. It seems that I just hit the wall on Friday's around 11 am. At that point I have had enough and all I want to do is crawl under my desk and cry. Nothing sets it off - I'm just overloaded by then. I thought I was the only one doing something like that, but a classmate yesterday mentioned that by the end of the day on Thursday's and Friday's she and the people sitting in her row get really giggly and can't stop. I'm not in a "giggle kind of row" so my sign of being overwhelmed is the intense urge to cry for no apparent reason. I'm hoping that this Friday will be different and I can make it at least until 2 pm before it hits.

Don't worry, I'm fine - this is just the reality of nursing school. We have so much information thrown at us that after a while it gets a bit too much. The head of our program, Dr. Whirlwind (not her real name, she is just like a whirlwind - always around and doing something) said that if we can get through this program, everything else will be much easier to us.

The Uniforms are Here! The Uniforms are Here!

OK, so it doesn't have the same ring as Steve Martin exclaiming, "The new phone book is here! The new phone book is here!" in the movie The Jerk - but we did get our uniforms yesterday. Mine are proudly sitting right were I left them yesterday when I got home. I like my lab coat and am not that thrilled with giving it up to look like a glorified hotel maid. Once I get them out of the package and iron them I'll post pictures.